Welcome back aloneness; my old friend, my walks’ companion,
my childhood playmate, my teen years’ confidant and today’s peace-giver.
With
you, I feel the very life I am, the beauty within, that sacred unfathomable imperishable
part of my being. With you, I am complete. I don’t need to try hard, I don’t
need to think and I don’t need to be afraid. All I need, when I am with you, is
to be and to be who I am: the One, the Being, the Source – a manifestation of
life and nothing else; not Lona, not a female, not in my 20s, not a postgraduate
student, not married and not a Muslim. With you, I simply am.
I am
the consciousness beyond the mind, the power beyond the weakness and fragility,
the courage beyond the anxiety and fear and the ultimate goal beyond all dreams
and ambitions. I am life awakening to itself, life awakening to its infinity,
its potentials and both its mortality and immortality.
I am the face behind the mask, the
spirit inhabiting the flesh, the immortal inhabiting this mortal shell that is
called: a human.
One moment I am here, the next one I
am gone. Yet, I have never been really here and I am never really gone. My
mortal life is just a second in the life of this existence; a pause, a breath
and a tune in life’s symphony. Therefore, all I have is NOW. Now is the only time
I have; yesterday is gone and tomorrow may never be. Now is my only
opportunity, the answer to all my questions and the key that can open all the locked doors.
I, the world and everything exist
now, at this very moment and they may be gone by next minute. Now is the real
time and only time and every other time is an illusion. Past and future are
nothing but illusions and Illusion is where misery is, where I will be kept
captive, blind and desperate. Now is the only reality and only reality can set me
free and give me peace. Now is where I need to be and I am all I need to be.

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